did you know that Dr. Hopperheimerhausen revealed a most secretive fact of the human condition to me. yes. He claimed after being blown to oblivion and clawing his way back the obscure order of the chaos we push down our throats and that circulates in our arteries and capillaries numerous times, that you can make your own fate. there's an existentialist for you. i always find it terribly humorous that they who find no hope in longevity for the amazing race some how craft a airless cell in white cap swell. endings are nearly as certain as beginnings, without either one the other could not endure. thats what i told him. he found his happy high holding close to the ever indelible phrase coined by elliott in the instrumental "im gonna get to heaven". we all make that same promise. but it falls apart like everything else. the man of 55, looked at me with glazed over eyes sunken beneath brows like a garden over grown, through his horn rimmed glasses, blankly, intently, patiently. he then said "what the hell have i been living for my whole life?" I said, "kumquats, indeed". we both laughed. that's a secret.